MY HEALTH AND LIFE'S ISSUES

My seems to keep deteriorating.... BUT I don't seem to want to do anything about it.... Why? Because I seem to have this crazy idea that I am going to suffer the same fate as my fate as my Mother. She passed away 11 years ago at 66 years old from ALS or Lou Gehrig's Disease. Why do I think this? BECAUSE: Of all of her children, I am the MOST like her: I look like her - I am the only child who has her coloring - Blonde hair Hazel eyes. All of my siblings have dark hair and eyes. I am the same height as was: 5'4" I have the same weight issues she did: I am struggling with it. I have been depressed for most of my life; as was she. We both had difficult childhoods. Different reasons, same results. Her mother died at the age of 66 years, from complications resulting from obesity, heart issues, blood pressure issues and diabetes. I am obese, have diabetes, high cholesterol, depression, and thyroid issues. Her next oldest sister died due to complication with ALS....at the age of 66 years. So I figure that I have approximately 15 years of life left. I am 50 years old at this moment. So instead of fighting to get "well" I am curling into a ball, and slowly succumbing to my fate. Why though? I have two kids who need me....although I am sure that my husband could manage quite well without me.... I have never heard him say otherwise, so I assume that this is so. (I have told him on several occasions that I could never have accomplished what we have without him.) ? What is it gonna take to shake me out of this? I have already almost died once during a surgery.....does this need to happen again? Maybe if I remembered anything about the near death experience, it would make a difference.....maybe. WHAT DO I DO ????

SAME OLD SAME OLD.......

Looking over my past posts, I've come to realize that the issues in my life keep rotating.....taking turns repeating themselves over and over again..... Why? I TRY to resolve each issue as it arises.... I THOUGHT that I had them conquered.... BUT NO! I guess that I was just fooling myself into thinking that these issues were done and over with! Why? Why doe they keep repeating themselves? I am I not learning anything from them? Is my husband? I have always though of myself as being reasonably intelligent.... I have always thought of my husband as more intelligent than me.... (I have learned A LOT from him, and hopefully he has learned something good from me.) We have been trough a lot together in the past 21 years. But still the question remains, why are the same thing repeating themselves? Is there nothing NEW for us to learn? Or do we just look for something new in the same old issues? Why? What purpose would that serve? Is there anything new to be found there? If so, why have I not seen it before, if they repeating? Same issues, same lessons....right?

TO FOSTER OR NOT TO FOSTER.........

We've been fostering rescue dogs for about 6 months now.

In that time we've only had ONE bad experience.

But..........
she's been enough of a handful that I am considering NOT fostering again!

She came to us Christmas Eve, and right away we experienced what a handful she is !

Such a handful i fact that, I stayed behind on Christmas Day to watch over her !
She can scale a fenced yard like there was nothing there!
She won't go in a kennel.....she's WILD on a leash.....and she's BOSSY with my dog !

I reported this a soon as I could to get help with her, and the foster group's answer was to try to move her ASAP !

Well, it's almost a week later, and she's still here ! She is NOW leaving New Year's Day, which means that I will once again, miss another family gathering !

GAH !

NOW WHAT WOULD YOU DO ?

WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO ?

What is this world coming to ?

Last fall my family went swimming at the local leisure centre . It was our daughter's birthday, and we took two of her friends with us . We were to go to the local pizza place later and then to our home for "presents and cake".

However, these plans changed for myself and one of the little girls that we had invited...

As we were changing back into out street clothes, she started to scream and carry on saying that someone was taking her picture from under the stall's wall !

From the instant she started, it seemed that all "you know what" was breaking loose !

From what seemed out of nowhere, the leisure centre security guard appeared and kept the perpetrator in his change stall. Then the police arrived to take our statements, and take the guy into custody.

We gave our statements again the centre's security guard, then the girl and I went off to the police station where we were to meet the officer who had attended the incident.

While waiting for the officer, we witnessed the officer bring the perpetrator into the station in handcuffs.

When he was secured, we were asked to come in to give our statements again to the officer.

When we were finally done, we joined the others at the pizza joint, and I tried to act as if nothing had happened

TEACHERS' STRIKE

For the last week, I have been homeschooling my children due to a teachers' strike in school district.

We only work for half a day, but sometimes it is really hard to motivate my 11 year-old to do the work.

I'm not teaching them anything new, because the teachers are not allowed to send any home. They can send workbooks, and then parents can try to teach whatever is next in the book.

Unfortunately, my son "forgot" to bring any hoem with him. So I went onto the net and downloaded some.

We also have educational software that both kids have been working with. My (11year old) son loves "Math Blaster". I'm glad that he does. Math Blaster is a video game-like math software, so that's probably why he likes it . (He LOVES his PS-2!)

It's only been a week, but I don't know how much longer I can keep him motivated. So far my daughter has noproblem doind the workbooks that she brought home. --I hope that this keeps up!

I've heard rumors that the strike could last anywhere from another week, to three more weeks. So far the two sides have net met for exactly one week. They keep acusing each other of not wanting to meet when the other calls for a meeting. Who knows what is really happening. Any teachers that I know personally cannot talk about it (as per their union rules.) So I will try to attend the next School Board Meeting to try to get their side. I may even get the union's side if there is a Union Rep. there also.

Wish me luck.

FINDING A PLACE TO WRITE

I've always wanted to write .



I just never could decide how, when, where etc....



Then it "hit me" : create a blog !



What better way to get my thoughts "published", reviewed, critiqued....



I find writing very therapeutic : a great outlet for excess feelings and thoughts .



I have a lot of "stuff" milling about in my head : my genealogical research, the effect that my Mom's death had/has on me, the present state of my family, the world's situations.....I could go on......and on.....


More later......